Monday, February 18, 2008

Nazi Party, Klu Klux Klan, Electronics Boutique

In today's hectic and inflation-driven world, what do you think $150.00 could get you? Let's see:

  • 15 meatball subs from Subway
  • 3 DVD players from Big W

  • a decent week's worth of groceries from Coles

  • a week's rent on a one-bedroom apartment in Cannon Hill

There was something else...oh what was it?...oh yes, that's right...


Are we not bogged down enough in the financial department, you blood sucking bastards? Seriously, I feel like Atlas holding the Earth on his meagre shoulders when I look upon 2008 and all the video-game related purchases I need to make! You think this shameless attempt to send me to the poorhouse and the madhouse makes things any easier? Why don't you just burn down my house while you're at it? Yes I'll admit, this game is shaping up to destroy months of my life but I don't want to do it while eating 2-minute noodles!

I accept the fact that I may have to part with in excess of ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for a new release title nowadays but Good Christ, if I pay your price for this game plus an extra 40 dollars then I can pick up a brand-spanking new Playstation 2 console. And that thing was $700 when it was first released!

Come on EB, you can level with me - is it Satan? Is Satan your CEO? I can just imagine...

EB stooge: "Sir, we just received our first shipment of GTA 4. We can now start putting it on shelves and spreading the gaming goodness. Rockstar saves our arses again! Woo!"

Satan: "Swap that price sticker. Make it $150.00"

EB stooge: "Woo! Woo! W- uh...what? Sir? Did you just...oh..oh! That's a good one sir. You've still got it! Charge 150 bucks for a video game! Ha!"

Satan: "I'm serious, minion."

EB stooge: "But...but sir, that's not...we can't in our right minds charge that much. Everyone will despise us. Our Trade & Save policy will be worthless when they start firebombing our stores!"

Satan: "Die insect!"

EB stooge: "ARRRRGGGHHHH!!!!"

Satan: "You! Swap that price sticker!"

EB stooge #2: "No problem boss!"

You heartless money-grubbing scum! How can you look your children in the eyes without the overwhelming guilt stabbing you in the heart! Thanks to you, come April 29th I'm going to go from this:

to this:

That aside, the game looks sweet.

1 comment:

  1. I find the fact that you are currently a 1980's Michael Douglas to be a little disturbing :).

    Nonetheless, I'm thinking...are sights set too high? Don't buy at EB games...try JB Hi-Fi...or K-Mart :)